Life Without Thee Who Holds My Heart
by Petros24
Summary: SEQUEL to "Farewell to Thee Who Holds my Heart." Read that prior to this; otherwise, this story may not make sense. Goku starts his new life out as a separated parent. Chi Chi tries to cope with the change as well. Jacked up the rating to M for stronger language and dark themes.


This sequel was suggested by Animecartooncomicgirl; so thank you.

**Life Without Thee Who Holds My Heart**

After plotting along on _foot_, Goku reached the spot where his grandpa's house was. It took him days. He didn't eat or train during the journey. All he did was drink water as he felt thirsty. He never really even considered flying. The time walking provided the requisite sulking period. Plus, he wanted to continue hiding his power level to let the dust clear from his decision.

He still didn't regret his decision to leave. But that didn't mean it still didn't kill him. He really missed Chi Chi. He knew for a fact he would make sure to see the boys; but he was not going to give Chi Chi the gratification of him crawling back to her. He didn't want to. She never understood him, or even made an effort to do so. That made things hurt even more. And it wasn't like he could try and just start over. What other woman would understand his powers? Or why he lacked a general common sense about the ways of the world?

Since he was finally here, he figured he'd start building. After leveling a bunch of trees and making logs with his quick hands, he had most of the raw materials needed for a house. By the end of the day, he finished. It had a kitchen, a living space, and two bedrooms. He made two so there would be one for the boys to sleep in if they visited.

_Gohan, Vegeta, and Piccolo _

Though his energy only shot up slightly because of his house build, Gohan, Piccolo, and Vegeta all could sense Goku now along with his approximate location. Though Gohan was at the university doing work, he wasted no time blasting off in that direction. Piccolo decided to sit this one out, realizing that both Gohan and Vegeta were about to enter the fray. He'd talk with Goku when there would be more privacy.

Vegeta knew about the situation from Bulma, who received a sob filled phone call from Chi Chi the night of the incident. After hearing about it, Vegeta figured Goku must be in a lot of emotional pain. Vegeta went to find Bulma and brought her with him to Goku's location.

_Back to Goku_

Though his home didn't have indoor plumbing or any kind of irrigation, that really didn't matter to Goku since he was so used to living in the outdoors. He looked at his home, decided it was cozy enough, and called it day. Unfortunately, his day wasn't over.

Gohan didn't take long to figure out where Goku was staying.

"DAD! Come outside!"

Never one to deny his son, Goku walked out of his cabin.

"Hey Gohan," a very depressed sounding Goku greeted.

"Hey Dad. What the hell happened a few days ago? I mean, Mom told me what happened; but you figured it would be good to just pack up and leave? Both you and Mom truly love each other, despite what happens sometimes. Not to make things uncomfortable, but I know because I could often hear it. A lot of times I'd have Goten wear earplugs and pretend it was a game. And I'm not just talking about sex either. You two would ramble on and on and talk until like…three or four in the morning. I could clearly hear your conversations through the wall. Anyway, my point is that your action makes no sense to me."

Goku had some very visible blush on him. But he continued on, "It's true Gohan, I have endless feelings for your mother. I know she more or less feels the same way; but she would rarely show it. It got to a point where it just hurt too bad to not feel reciprocation from the one you love the most. Imagine if Videl acted toward you the way your mother often did toward me. How would you feel?"

Gohan internally thought that his father had some good points and wasn't sure what to say. But he still found it amazing that his father, the most powerful man in the galaxy, could be so hurt by his mother.

"You know Dad, I remember on Namek, when you first saw Frieza you walked right toward him without any sign of fear despite knowing the odds were stacked against us. It's hard to believe my mother could hurt someone like that. I'm sorry."

"You shouldn't be Gohan. This has nothing to do with you. You've always made me proud as a father, whether it be on the battlefield or in the classroom."

Gohan and Goku embraced in a father/son hug. Gohan realized there would be no convincing his father of anything, at least not today.

"Well Dad, if this is what you think is best, I can't stop you. Just make sure to continue seeing Goten on a regular basis. I have my own family now, but he still needs you the way I did when I was his age."

"No doubt, Gohan. You have my word."

"Okay Dad. I have to get back to work. I'll stop by every now and then, and you do the same. Remember you have a granddaughter who adores you."

"Alright Gohan," Goku offered a forced chuckle.

With that, Gohan took off, thinking that he would have to try and convince his father he was making a mistake at a future date.

No sooner had Gohan sped off, Vegeta landed in front of Goku with Bulma.

Though surprised, Goku offered up a "Hey guys!"

"Don't you 'Hey guys' us, Goku! Chi Chi has been in tears for days because of you and your boneheaded decision!"

Vegeta rolled his eyes at Bulma's rash reaction.

"Bulma, give Kakarot space."

"Protecting your monkey subject?"

"Quiet woman! Kakarot is not one to make these kinds of decisions without thought. He's too sentimental."

Goku watched the two do what they do best…argue.

"He's a moron! What other woman would ever take him?"

"You don't even know if he wants another woman! As far as you know, he's had enough! Even still, a mighty Saiyan would have plenty of other prospects on this planet." Vegeta stated proudly with a smug face.

"Get over yourself!" Bulma yelled with an acerbic bite.

Goku found this strange. Bulma was his oldest friend. And yet she was against him and on Chi Chi's side, while Vegeta, who once wanted him dead, was standing up for him. Perhaps overtime, Bulma became closer to Chi Chi with the Saiyan motherhood bond, and the whole Buu fiasco brought Goku and Vegeta closer together, though Vegeta would rarely admit to it.

"Good grief. Kakarat, can you get Bulma out of here?"

"What do you mean?"

"Take her back to West City and return to me here."

Goku was apprehensive to do this to Bulma; but he felt betrayed in a way.

"Okay." Goku Instant Transmissioned Bulma back to Capsule Corp and returned.

"Wonderful. Let me make this clear Kakarat, I will never again extend this courtesy to you. However, if you wish to speak with me about the situation, please contact me. The Woman never makes me feel so upset that I leave…and least not recently. I can only imagine what you have inside of you right now. If that same situation ever happened between Bulma and me, I'd be crushed without a sense of direction or purpose. Don't repeat that to anyone, understand!" Vegeta concluded by grabbing Goku by the collar.

"I got it Vegeta." Goku said with quick smile. "Thank you for extending the courtesy."

"Very well. I'll return to West City. Seek me if you are looking for guidance."

Meanwhile, after Gohan left, Piccolo left the lookout and did his usual thing of standing there so no one could see or sense him. He witnessed all of Goku and Vegeta's interactions.

After Vegeta left, Piccolo took advantage of the privacy. He landed dramatically in front of Goku by swinging his cape around like a fictitious superhero.

"I should have known you were there." Goku remarked.

"Yea, just wanted to make sure you're okay."

"In the end, I'm okay Piccolo. I know you don't understand these kinds of emotions; but I am truly hurt. I still love Chi Chi, and I always will. That she has never been able to show the same for me has recently become too much to bear. That's why I left. I suppose the closest thing for you would be if Gohan started constantly insulting you all of the sudden."

"It's true. I don't fully understand the emotions you're referencing. However, judging by how disrupted you're energy is, I at least understand the magnitude of it. I waited until Gohan and Vegeta came and went so we could talk in private. I hope you don't mind."

"No, not at all Piccolo. I'm glad you're here.

"You don't seem to be in a talking mood Goku; so I'll leave you to your own devices for now and head back to the lookout."

"…Heh heh, yea. You're right. I'll see you later Piccolo."

"Farewell my friend."

Goku headed in to lie down. He was emotionally gassed from all of this. Is was a mere seconds before he fell asleep with a small tear falling from his eye.

Meanwhile, back at Mount Paotz, Goten had been remaining quiet since Goku left. He still couldn't believe what was happening. He spent a lot of time at his brother's house and played with his toddler niece to distract his mind. Chi Chi never showed any sign of breaking down in front of Goten since the evening Goku left; but when she was alone, she would sit at the kitchen table and begin shedding tears. She had been effectively catatonic since then, part from the time she spoke to Bulma on the phone. She had burned through the moonshine they had while talking on the phone to Bulma. Goten asked Videl for help after Chi Chi collapsed from intoxication because he didn't know what was wrong with his mother. Since then Gohan relied on Videl to check-in a couple times a day while was at work.

Goku woke the next morning to extreme hunger. As much as hated hurting living things, he killed and deer for his own survival and started a fire to cook it.

After finishing the venison, Goku thought it might be good to pay Goten a visit. He hadn't talked to him since he left, and he was sure there were several things he wanted to ask. Goku Instant Transmissioned to the Son home and figured Goten would pick up his power nearby and come out. He didn't want to see Chi Chi.

On cue, Goten ran out of the house and toward his father.

"Dad!"

"Hi son."

Goten quickly embraced Goku started to shed tears.

"Why did you leave Dad? I miss you being around. And Mom is wreck without you. She almost died from alcohol poisoning the day after you left."

The latter statement caught Goku off-guard. He had the misfortune of still deeply caring for Chi Chi, and he would be fibbing to say he wasn't concerned.

"How's your Mom doing now?"

"She better, but Gohan has Videl come by the house a few times a day to check up on her and make sure there is no alcohol in the house. Outside of the that, she pretty much just mopes around, and she often starts crying when I'm not around. I know because I can hear her and I see her will swollen and red eyes a lot of the time."

Goku never thought Chi Chi would become a candidate for alcoholism.

"Why won't come back Dad? Whatever happened with you and Mom, there's no reason you can't work things out. You both love each other. This doesn't make sense to either me or Gohan."

"Listen Goten, your mother and I have always had trouble reconciling what she wants for the family and what I need to do as the planet's protector. Most recently, years of us at odds about it came to a head. It's become way too evident that she lacks appreciation or even respect for my responsibilities. It doesn't make sense for me to be there anymore. I can't give her what she wants…has always truly wanted. I need to be free to do my duty without her trying to impose what she thinks is an ideal life for us."

"Dad, she loves you more than anything in the world. She can't get out of her own way knowing you've removed yourself from her life."

"Well she never really learned to show that, Goten."

"…Dad…I just don't know how to deal with this."

"I'm not going to be dishonest, it'll be a change. But from your standpoint, you still have the support from your mother, me, and your brother just as you did before. I'm not going away Goten. I just won't be around your mother."

Goku's words failed to counsel Goten, but figured he may as well get used to these new arrangements.

"Alright Dad. I want to see you at least four or five times a week. And we'll still train on weekends, right?"

"Absolutely Goten."

"Okay then. I'm going to head back to the house. I don't think Mom knows where I am right now."

The two embraced again as Goku said his goodbye for now.

Goku thought about heading home, but his interaction with Goten made him feel terrible. It seemed like Goku leaving his mom rocked his entire world.

Goku then remembered "_I'll only extend this courtesy to you once Kakarot…"_

He blasted away for Capsule Corp, needing some time to think on the way of what exactly he was going say to Vegeta, the only other man on the planet who could fully understand the whole situation.

Goku landed at CC's main entrance and buzzed the bell, praying that Bulma not answer the door.

He was instead greeted by Bulla, "Hi Goku!"

"Hey Bulla. Is your daddy around?"

Bulla still speaking with the voice inflection of little girl, "Mmm…I think he's in the gravity room. Lemme check."

Surprisingly, Vegeta wasn't in the GR. "Mom! Do you know where Daddy is?"

Goku's stomach dropped.

"Hm. I think he's relaxing in the garden honey…oh the home wrecker's here! You don't get to have your group therapy session with Vegeta until I get done with you. Got it!?"

Goku really didn't have any say in the matter; so if this was his only course of action, he had to take it.

"What'd you want to say to me Bulma?" Goku asked with the same facial expression and tone that made Frieza shiver. That of course didn't work with Bulma.

"Foremost, what I want to know is who the fuck do you think you are!?"

"Well that's a question for ages, Bulma. Who am I? What am I? Not easy to answer for anyone." Goku wasn't in the mood for Bulma's pissy rants so he was not beyond messing with her right now.

"You know what I mean jackass! Just because you're the mighty _Kakarot_ doesn't give you prerogative to walk out on your youngest son and my closest friend."

"And just because you're the supposedly gorgeous, politically powerful, and wealthy Bulma Briefs doesn't give you prerogative to speak to me like a piss ant. That crap may fly with Vegeta, but keep in mind I'm not your husband, or fuck buddy, or whatever the hell you two are."

"How dare you! A backwards hayseed such as yourself cannot come into _my _home and speak to me that way!"

Goku and Bulma never swapped personal insults like this. Goku still considered her a good friend and wanted to try redirecting this conversation.

Goku took a deep breath and then asked, "Listen, Bulma, before we make these insult wounds permanent, what exactly did Chi Chi tell you regarding what happened?"

"She said you two had an argument after you returned home from training, and then you went off on something about her not respecting you or what you devote yourself to. Then she said you slipped out the bedroom window like a burglar."

"That's about right. So we're at least dealing with the same basic info. Considering that's the case, why are you so upset with me? You know how Chi Chi has always been with my training. She's never come to terms with the fact that I really don't have a choice in what I do. I am the primary protector of Earth because no one else can be."

"Goku, she's like that because she loves you. She still loves you like a school girl the way she did when you were younger."

"I know that, but she's never been able to really show it. It would have been nice every now and then for her to at least show some approval and support for the responsibility I bear."

"How dense are you?! The woman cooks a TON of food for your insane appetite, cleans your clothes after they get all sweaty from training, and single handedly raised your two sons when you weren't around. What more do you want from her?"

"Bulma, she has often held all of that against me, and never once at least conceded that I had legitimate reasons for taking the actions I did. It became too much for me when I returned after my three months of training. I realized who I am and what I have to do will never fit into her vision for a perfect marriage and family life. So I decided it would best for both of us if I left."

"I can clearly tell you it's been bad for both of you. Chi Chi is on alcohol watch from Videl and Gohan if you haven't heard. And you're clearly not yourself. You're acting bitter and cocky, probably to mask the level of depression you have right now."

"There will be some adjustments, but I still feel like this is the best thing. Maybe Chi Chi will find another man who can fulfill her desires of more normal lifestyle. As for me, I can keep doing what destiny had thrust upon me without regrets."

As Goku concluded, Vegeta finally walked in. Goku was a bit upset because he knew Vegeta could sense him.

"Bravo, that was quite a show you two put on." Vegeta snarked with his usual grin.

"_I guess some things never change."_ Goku thought.

"Kakarot, come into the garden with me."

"Oh no you don't. He's in _my_ house, and I really don't want him here anymore." Bulma blustered.

"What are you going to do? Call your security on him? I'm sure they'll get the job done." Vegeta snickered.

Figuring Bulma would try to eavesdrop anyway, decided they'd be better off alone somewhere else.

"Kakarot, let's take off to a place where we'll have privacy."

Goku and Vegeta landed in desolate wasteland. It was the kind of place Piccolo used to train before he permanently moved to the lookout.

"So Kakarot, what's going on? The Woman was way too emotional for me to take testimony seriously."

"I suppose the short version is that I realized Chi Chi and I would never be able to reconcile our differences. She has a vision of a perfect family life and a paragon husband. On the other hand, I've had no choice but to become the protector of this planet. It increasingly became clear to me when I returned from my circuit, which I'm sure you remember, that she really has no respect for that responsibility or what I do to try and fulfill it. I figured that it ultimately make us both better off if I left."

"True, that woman of yours never understood the duty you garner. For that matter, I don't think she's ever fathomed the extent of your accomplishments. You freed the galaxy, specifically including yours truly, from Frieza. You assisted your son in defeating Cell from the other world. You were ultimately the one who defeated Majin Buu, even it though was my plan. Without you, I would have wiped this planet out with its inhabitants when I first came here with Nappa. Frankly, I think you're in the right here Kakarot. Though I can understand the difficultly of being away from her. It's quite evident you still have deep feelings for that woman."

"Yea, I do. I still love her as much as I always have. But sometimes even when people love each other they can't find common ground on the most important things. My biggest concern now is that is sounds like Chi Chi has been trying to find refuge in booze. Considering that I still care greatly for her, that worries me. Moreover, my leaving seems to have taken a huge toll on Goten. He's still reeling from the idea of me not ever living in the house again."

"Yes, I heard about the alcohol issue. It's very uncharacteristic of her. Regarding the boy, it's unfortunate that he's caught in the middle. But if you continue serving as a father to him as you have, then I don't see why he won't be able to grow accustom to the change. I sense his biggest fear is that he's lost you, which is evidently not the case. Regarding the woman on the other hand, her not finding a way a deal with his could greatly impact him. That specifically would be my chief concern at the moment."

"Sure, I never really thought it that far through."

"Unless you plan on returning to her, you may want to have at least one final discussion about her and the boy. Mainly, you need to ensure her destructive behaviors do not affect Goten."

"That's not a bad thought Vegeta. I can't rely on Gohan and his wife to watch over her constantly the way they have."

There was a noticeable silence between the two Saiyans after Goku's latter statement.

"Are we finished here?"

"I suppose, yes. I have nothing else to say. I guess I hoping for some advice, and I got it. So thank you Vegeta."

"Fine. Remember, I won't do this again. I never really like your wife anyway. She tried everything she could to basically turn you into an Earthling, which you kind of are since you lived here all your life. But at your core your still a Saiayn. My concern now is your youngest son. Even if he is a half-breed, I don't want another Saiyan's life running off the tracks because his unstable Earthling mother can't get herself straight."

"Okay. Thanks again Vegeta."

With that the two parted ways. There was still some time left in the day; so Goku considered following up on Vegeta's recommendation in short order.

Before he could do that, Piccolo popped out of nowhere.

"I'm surprised Vegeta was willing to do this."

"You and me both Piccolo."

"Look, I really have nothing to add to what he said. As we've covered, this whole thing is out of my league. I really don't understand 'love' per se. I've grown to understand friendship; but not some unconditional attachment to a person, which seems to be the norm with humans. I agree you should try to set Chi Chi straight so she doesn't do anything that disrupts Goten's development."

"That's what I was actually about to go do now."

"Very well then. I'll speak with you at some point in the future I'm sure." Piccolo grinned with his attempt at humor.

Goku blasted off toward Mount Paotz. He landed at the door and knocked. As he hoped, Chi Chi answered.

"…Goku… Do you want to see Goten?" Chi Chi asked in a very shocked a quiet tone.

"No, I came here to speak with _you_ about Goten."

From the kitchen, Goku heard a male voice ask, "Chi Chi, where's the paprika?"

Goku had a puzzled look on his face, and then the voice came to the door.

"Hi, I'm Anil. Nice to meet you. What's your name?"

"Hi, I'm Goku." Goku shook his hand to be polite and avoid any ridiculous side shows.

"I'm in the middle of cooking right now Goku."

"Can you at least step outside for a few minutes?"

"Okay."

"Look, I heard from Goten and Bulma that you had pretty strong alcohol poisoning the day after I left. Goten also told me that Videl and Gohan have been checking up on you everyday to make sure you don't hit the bottle again. I came here to speak with you and to make sure that your reaction to everything won't negatively affect Goten. I'm not coming back, but if there's something outside of that I can do to help you so any habits you develop don't hurt Goten, please tell me."

"Oh, Goku. I'm sorry you had a scare like that. Yes, I didn't react appropriately the day after. But I realized after that the way things would be and worked to accept it. That's not going to happen again. It was extremely irresponsible of me, especially considering I have a still young boy to properly influence. Nothing has happened since then. I haven't even had the urge to escape reality. I'm embracing a new one."

"Well…good. I'm glad. That's what Goten needs."

"Yes, very much."

"So who is this guy in the kitchen?...If you don't mind me asking."

"Oh, Anil and I met at the market a few days ago. He's a real estate investor in West City. We hit it off, and so I invited him to dinner. I suppose you were right in a way Goku. Though I have never ending love for you, one thing I always felt was missing was a sense of normalcy. Perhaps this man can provide that."

"Okay then. I'm glad you recognized that Chi Chi. Listen, I'm still going to be around quite a bit to see Goten and Gohan when he's available. Perhaps it's best if we don't have an estranged relationship even though we're separated."

"Yes, I agree. If only for the boys' sake. And it's not like we really hate each other, and least I don't think so."

"Right, I agree."

Goten then came rushing out the door to greet his father.

"Chi Chi, can I talk to Goten alone?"

"Of course."

"Hey Goten. What do you think about this guy?"

"He seems friendly, and he helps Mom cook too, which she likes. I don't know. It's really weird for me because she seems to be happy around him; but for me, he's not my Dad. You are."

"Yea, I can understand. But you're right, I'm your Dad, and nothing is going to ever change that, got it?"

"Yep."

"How are you doing with everything?"

"I guess I have to accept that you and Mom are a part, and also that she is going to start dating other men. It's definitely a weird feeling; but as long as I know you'll still be there for me and spend time with me, I guess I can live it."

"That's my boy."

"Anyway, I think they're almost done, so I'm going to go back inside. I'll see you tomorrow right? We're supposed to train together."

"You better believe it." Goku stated with a faux sense of positivity.

Goku flew back to his cabin. He sat down and literally started crying. Hopefully Piccolo wasn't snooping around. Though he said it would be better for Chi Chi to be with someone who would fit her idea of family and married life, seeing it firsthand tore him to pieces. He knew it was the best for her and syllogistically his youngest son; but it wasn't best for him. Everyone was concerned about Chi Chi being an emotional wreck, but it became increasingly visible that he was the one who was unstable. All he had now was his training, and a responsibility of protector that he never wanted in the first place. Nonetheless, he remained adamant that all of this was for the best, even though Chi Chi was the one who would always hold his heart.


End file.
